Like wine and cheese humans get better with age

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The other day my seven year old daughter Emma asked me how I felt
about being old. I was taken aback, for I do not think of myself as old,
am only thirty nine and look a lot younger than that. When she saw my
reaction when she said that she was immediately embarrassed, but I explained
that it was an interesting question, and I would ponder it, and let her know. 

Middle Age, I decided, is a gift. I am now, probably for the first time in my life,
the person I have always wanted to be. Oh, not my body! I sometimes
despair over my body, the not so flat tummy which has carried two children, 
the look on my face that tells a life story. And often I am taken aback by that
not so young but wise looking person with a few strands of white hair that lives
in my mirror (who looks like me), but I don't agonize over those things for long.
I would never trade the amazing friends I acquired as I got older, my wisdom,
my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become
more kind to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend. 
I don't chide myself for eating that extra portion of sadza with meat & vegetables, 
once in a while or for spending a whole Saturday morning in my bed, or for buying
that silly painting that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my bedroom wall.
I am entitled to a treat, to make myself happy, to be carefree. I have seen too many 
of my dear siblings, friends and relatives leave this world too soon, before they
understood the great freedom that comes with aging. Whose business is it if I
choose to read  or write or play on the computer until 4am and sleep until noon?
I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 80's  & 90's,
and if I, at the same time, wish to smile or weep over the beautiful, meaningful
and classic tunes of those golden oldies... I will. I will walk towards the swimming
pool in a swim suit that is stretched over a tummy that stretched with two pregnancies,
and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances
from the jet set. They, too, will get old. 
I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some
of life is just as well forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.
Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break
when you lose a loved sibling like Elyween, Eustace & Ephraim, loved cousins
like Charleen & Samantha, a beloved mother, or when you see your father
suffering with the loneliness of missing mum, or even when an old lonely 
neighbor's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us
strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine
and sterile and will never appreciate the value of love .  I am so blessed to
have lived long enough to have my broken heart mended, and to
have my youthful experiences which are forever etched into deep grooves on
my face provide me with the wisdom to make the right decisions in my present
life. As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other
people think, I am more concerned with what makes Dumi, myself & our kids
happy. I've even earned respect , love, happiness and peace and embrace all
that into my life.
So many have never have life bring so many laughs as well as tears like what life
did to me over the years, and so many have died before they could meet their
soulmate. I thank God everyday for making me live to be the person I have
become and especially for giving me Dumi my soulmate to love and to cherish.

So, to answer Emma's question, I like being old. It has set me free. I
like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am
still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying
about what will be. Yes being old is good if you look at the love mirrored in your
children's eyes as they look at you. Yes getting old is good if you have a lot of
testimonies about the grace  of  God to tell.  Yes getting old is good if you learnt 
lessons from all the issues of life you experienced and use the lessons to make
yourself a better person or to make the world the best place to live in.